If married, nearly all spouses or partners of sex addicts are traumatized by the lies, deception, and unhealthy sexual behavior. Therefore, it is beneficial for the spouses of addicts to receive counseling and build a supportive network to endure the painful process of recovery. Sexual addiction results in severely damaged relationships, but we believe that recovery and healing is possible. Counselors will typically work with addicts and their partners individually, followed by couples counseling to begin working on rebuilding the relationship.

There are several important things to keep in mind as the spouse/partner of a sex addict.

  1. You are not responsible for creating or contributing to you partners addiction. Your partner’s addiction is entirely the result of decisions they have made.
  1. Your feelings will probably be cyclical. At one moment you will feel loving and loyal to your spouse, and other times you will hate them and want to give up on the relationship. It can be helpful to be aware of this cycle and to expect it.
  1. Although it will be tempting to focus solely on the recovery of the addict, both of you need to receive healing. You must be sure to care for yourself and get the support and care that you need. Strongly consider receiving your own individual counseling and joining a spouses of sex addicts support group.
  1. Try to not shut down or shut out your partner. The road to recovery will include open, honest, and direct dialogue about this issue. You need to tell your partner how much their behavior has hurt you and your family. It is not wrong to be angry. This is a normal and healthy response to the discovery of sex addiction.

Our counselors can help you process the pain and emotions of this discovery, establish healthy boundaries in your relationship, and build a network of support for you during this difficult time. We encourage spouses to get help even if their partner is not ready to begin the healing process. This may actually encourage them to get help as well.

The counselors at Waterstone Counseling Center would love to walk with you and guide you through this extremely challenging process. Please give us a call today and we will share with you more about the benefits of counseling and support groups for spouses of sex addicts.


Waterstone Counseling Center is a full-service family counseling practice that provides a wide range of services for individuals, couples, and families in Northwest Arkansas. » Contact us to learn more